How Jaxson dresses himself. No outfit in Jaxson's book is complete until the spongebob pants are on.

My dearest Connor. Connor was my long awaited miracle. I never believed that I would have a child and when I got pregnant with Connor, I vowed that if anything went wrong with the pregnancy, I would NEVER try again. After 9 months of fretting, stressing, and obsessing over this child he came into my world and turned it upside down. He was my beautiful baby and will always hold a special place in my heart. It's not that I love him more than I love Jaxson, I don' t even think that is possible but I spent two years alone with Connor. It was just the two of us and I hold that very dear to me. Why am I being so emotional? Because I found out today that Connor has his first loose tooth. I know, it is silly but a part of me is reflecting back on the past 5 years and I am shaking my head wondering, where did time go? It seems like only yesterday that I was walking the floor with him trying to bounce the colic right out of him. Now he is 5 and getting ready for kindergarten and his baby teeth are getting ready to fall out. I caught a scary look at the future today during church when I suddenly imagined what the next 5 years will be like. He is going to become a sports obsessed boy who will start becoming more interested in playing with friends than laying with mom on the couch watching cartoons (yes, I am that kind of mom) and I feel like I am starting to grab for memories. I never thought that I would want to freeze time. I have always looked forward to the day that my kids would become more independent and grown up and now I am SCREAMING for time to slow down. Connor went for his kindergarten check up last week. The doctor came in and was doing the usual exam. She listened to his breath sounds, his belly, and was starting to pull his boxers down to check his genitals when Connor got anxious and said, "Hey, what are you doing? That is my business" We laughed and laughed. He is really starting to develop his own personality (late because of his extreme shyness) and I love seeing what a little boy he has become. He makes me laugh daily and I enjoy every moment that I get to be his mother.

When it rains, it pours. I had ANOTHER bad night last night. I took care of a sweet little lady who was confused and disoriented. She thought the year was 1932 (that must have been some year) About 9 PM she decided to scale her bed rails and I found her flat on her back on the floor.

School, Spring, and Squirrels

** This blog may contain a dead squirrel***

Am I alive? I don't know. I think so. I have a pulse. (No, I am not the dead squirrel that I mentioned above. I think I am breathing but it that time of the year that I doubt, complain, and generally make everyone in my house miserable because you know that saying.....If momma aint happy, aint nobody happy. The time of the year for finals and the final two weeks before three months of nursing free sunshine. On top of finals and finishing the nursing semester, I have decided to potty train Jaxson. Well, let me clarify that, Jaxson has INSISTED that his mother start potty training him. The kid will NOT keep a diaper on and insists on wearing nothing but underwear.

Ok, back to nursing school. I just have to get this off my chest. I will just apologize now for any offense I may cause, and I have changed the names to protect the innocent. I want to give you an inside look at nursing school. Of course you may think this is a bias opinion because it is my opinion but I will give you the examples and stories that I have heard from many poor souls that have had to endure nursing school. I was not a believer. I heard the stories before I elected to go into the nursing career but blew them off believing with my self absorbed ego that I would never endure the horrors. I mean I was a 4.0 student. (I just love throwing that in, my self absorbed ego again) Let me first present what I know now after 2 years of nursing school... I am no longer a 4.0 student. I do NOT know half the stuff that I thought I did. I am nothing but a worthless piece of junk! Nurses actually do eat their young (only nurses and nursing students will understand that) and because I am a TRYING to be a positive person--- I still want to be a nurse. That being said......let me just share one story that is just BURNING my soul right now. I am hoping that if I get it off my chest.....I will be able to forget about it and move on. I had a clinical instructor last night that we will name Mrs. Dummie. (sorry, lame but all I could come up with right now) Let me present all the evidence in a list.
1. She showed up an hour late last night AFTER previously yelling at us 2 weeks ago because we were down in the cafe waiting for her and she was on the floor. She accused us of patient abandonment because we were 10 minutes late coming onto the floor. Yet NEVER said sorry or mentioned WHY she was 60 minutes late last night.
2. I went in with the nurse and did my nursing assessment and got the patient ready for bed. I turned her light out and she FINALLY fell asleep. She was agitated and confused so when she finally fell asleep it was like the sigh of relief you experience after getting a cranky child to bed. I walked out into the hall and Mrs. Dummie told me that she needed to go in with me to do my assessment. I explained that the nurse went in with me and that my patient had finally gone to sleep. Her response "Well, we are waking her up" and she did just that.
3. While in doing the assessment she was asking me a question and when I answered her she said "Don't talk and chew gum at the same time" in front of the patient. The worse part? I DID NOT have gum in my mouth
4. She told me to write in my nurses notes.......Resting comfortably. When I showed her the chart later in the night she yelled at me in front of everyone and said "Why did you write that? How do you know she is comfortable?" I wanted to yell, "Because Lady! You told me to write that!!"

That was my experience last night. Do I feel better? A little bit. I have been working on anger management and I feel that I hit a milestone last night because I managed to keep control and just let the anger stew inside of me. Is nursing school bad? Yes and no. This was by far the extreme of the bad. Most instructors are not like this. They are kind and willing to help out but it is just those few bad ones that make it so miserable.

I was driving home today thinking of last night over and over again in my head. I managed to pause for a few minutes and I noticed the beauty of the world right now. The flowers are blooming, the birds are out, the grass is green, and everything looks new. I was driving down the road and was marveling at how the tree branches were stretching out above me to form almost a tunnel of green over my car. I was lost in the magic of Spring and suddenly I heard a loud CRUNCH! One of the "magical" mammals of Spring managed to run under my tire. So much for the beautiful trees.

FINALLY!! A picture of his cute smile! I rarely catch his smile on camera because the minute I pull the camera out, he gets his "serious" face. This is the smile that makes my whole day!!

I am thankful today that I can walk, run, dance, sing, hug my children, laugh, cry, call a friend, see the sunshine, hear the birds singing, brush my teeth (my family is thankful for that also), read, that I have a roof over my head, I have heat to keep me warm or air conditioning to cool me off, a shower to clean myself, food to eat, a car to take me places, money to provide for my living expenses, two little boys that make EVERYTHING else seem meaningless, and clothes so that I do not have to blind the world with my nakedness.

I am on the final countdown of this semester. Only 3 more weeks left of nursing school for this semester. I cannot wait for summer. I plan on blowing bubbles, running in the park, playing soccer, and soaking up the sun with my boys for three months! This has NOT been the best semester and I am so excited to put it behind me.

A final note before I close. I know that I have told my friends at school but just to clarify for my friends that are not Mormon, the people being evacuated from the Texas compound are NOT Mormon! I explained this last night: Texas Compound=Reorganized Latter Day Saints .Shannon=Latter Day Saints. The show Big Love/Polygamy=Reorganized Latter Day Saints. One husband and no polygamy=Shannon. Compounds full of children and women looking like pioneers=Reorganized Latter Day Saints. Normal looking woman that likes to cook casseroles and sweet treats=Shannon

Stranger Danger

Connor has made some new friends in the neighborhood. Older friends that want to play out front and don't like being locked in the fenced backyard. I sat down with him last night and gave him the "Stranger Danger" talk. I felt it was going well until......

Mom: So, Connor, what would you do if a someone pulled up next to you in a car and said "hey little boy, I have some donuts in my car, do you want to come inside and have one?"

Connor: Is the stranger nice?

Mom: Yes, strangers can be very, very nice. They will offer you treats and toys. Do you ever get in the car with them?

Connor: If they have donuts I will

DOH! that was not the answer I was expecting. So we talked about Stranger Danger for another 10 minutes and felt it was test time again......

Mom: Ok, someone walks up to you and says they will take you to Chuck E Cheese if you come with them, what are you going to do?

Connor: Will they give me lots of tokens to ride the rides??

This was the end of the Stranger Danger talk and it has been decided in the Borowski home that Connor will NOT be allowed out front anymore unless someone is outside supervising him.

A conversation with Connor yesterday.
C: Mom, are we going out to eat lunch at Wendy's today?
Me: No, we are going home to eat lunch.
C: But MOM! I never get to go to Wendy's and eat lunch, I haven't been to Chuck E Cheese for a long time, and I never get to rent the Bee movie!!! It's a bad day!!

WOW, to be a child again. I wish my bad days consisted of not being able to go to Wendy's, Chuck E. Cheese, and renting the Bee movie. I love Connor's age right now and he amazes me everyday by how much he understands. Watching him grow and get comfortable in his own skin is the greatest blessing of my life. He is his own unique personality and has moved past the little blob of a toddler that resembled his parents and become his own individual spirit. My testimony of the divinity of each spirit is strengthened everyday that I watch Connor.

Too young to drive?

Connor got a new bike for Easter. He INSISTS that he had to take his "drivers license" when he gets on his bike. (it is really his child ID card if he ever gets kidnapped) He is so crazy!
Mom: "Connor, can you drive if you have a drivers license?"
Connor: "You are making a big mistake! I am little. I can drive my BIKE!!"