Dying with dignity

So, I have always had a huge interest in hospice care but lately, it is growing in intensity. I am just upset with the experiences that I have already had with patients dying and the end of life care they are receiving. Maybe I am too biased and close minded but I have a strong belief that everyone deserves to die with dignity and comfort. I do not see anything wrong with giving someone that is dying morphine. Does it decrease their respiration's to the point that it caused death to come sooner?? Maybe, it hasn't been proven but it makes those final moments where they are Cheyne Stoking and becoming oxygen starved less painful. I have witnessed first hand the change a patient experiences when they are in that final breathing pattern and they are administered morphine. They become so much more relaxed and peaceful. I also don't feel that addiction should even be considered when dealing with someone who is terminal. Who cares if they become addicted to pain medication? THEY ARE DYING!!!!

My next rant, feeding someone during the dying process. PLEASE do not let anyone feed me when I am dying. The body truly does run like a machine and when that machine starts shutting down, not all systems may be functioning anymore. People in the dying process stop eating for a reason. They are no longer physically hungry anymore. The digestive system has shut down. I know it seems cruel to not feed them but I have witnessed what happens when you feed them. It comes right back out, over and over again. It is not pleasant.

I feel so passionate about end of life care and it upsets me to know that not everyone feels the same way. (because everyone should feel the same way I do right?) Ok, they don't have to think the same as me but I really feel that in health care, the definition of comfort care is not clearly defined. It is something that is not really written in stone or discussed as much as other aspects of patient care and it is so important.

Maybe this is why I felt inspired to get into nursing. Maybe this is my plan......to change the way society views hospice care??? Who knows. But for the time being.....here are my wishes.

I do not want to be on a feeding tube when my body is ready to start shutting down
I do not want a machine to breathe for me when my years have past and my life fulfilled.
I do not want antibiotics to fight off an infections that may be the one thing that gives me the ability to close my eyes and pass into eternity. Dying of an infection is not a bad death.
I do not want crying, loud noises or fear. When the time comes, I will face death with the knowledge that I have that it is not the end.