Really miss my family and friends right now. Being in New Jersey has become very difficult. Baby blues?? Could be. I think about going home but a 4 day drive doesn't sound like fun. In fact, I would rather have all my toe nails pulled out. Even a 4 hour flight sounds like cruel torture with a 6 week old and a 4 year year old. I can feel the cloud sitting above my head and I know I need to do something to push it away before it starts raining. I have had post pardum depression with all my kids and this is the first one that I have decided NOT to use medication with....I just keep reminding myself...I can do this. I say this chant, "I will not become Brittney Spears, I will not become Brittney Spears" I would not look good bald. But I would look more like Carter.