After 4 years, our hamster Archie was found dead this morning. I didn't think this hamster would ever die. I bought Archie for Connor when he was 3 years old. I thought a hamster would be a good first pet. Easy maintenance and not long term.....4 YEARS!!! I NEVER expected him to last this long. Connor took it well and only seems concerned about his dog dying now. I keep explaining to him that Dallas will be around a lot longer than Archie.

So tired

I can't seem to catch up on my sleep. I think I could sleep for two days straight and still feel tired. (Maybe it is all an excuse to climb back into bed and enjoy my new Memory Foam)

Christmas morning was wonderful. Watching the boys unwrap all their gifts and the look of amazement when they discovered the exact things they asked Santa for. It was over a month of shopping and preparations and 15 minutes of wrapping paper flurry. Then, hours of toy assembling and clean up followed by work. It was still wonderful to see how happy the boys were. (Pictures to come soon)

I have been busy hitting all the after Christmas sales to try to build a clothing supply for this new baby. It is like having my first all over again. I love the after Christmas bin sale at Gymboree and this boy will look sharp his first few months. I'm actually starting to get excited to have another boy. I forgot how fun it can be to buy clothes for little boys. Dinosaurs, trucks, rocket ships, and monkeys.....I will take it any day over flowers and rainbows. (I can say that today, tomorrow may be a different story)

Blizzard 2009

I moved out of Canada to get away from the snow. I have been able to find one positive aspect of New Jersey. It always made me happy that we usually have a dry Christmas. We usually get snow once a year and not until January or February. Not this year! We got almost 2 feet of snow over the weekend. It came down so hard and fast that I went to work on Saturday night and had to stay in that town to be able to go to work on Sunday. It was cold, wet, and miserable. I know I have officially become old when I hate the snow and can only enjoy watching my kids savor it from the comfort of the window. I spent Saturday morning digging my car out for over an hour because I was stuck on the side of the road at 5 AM trying to get to work. I got to work and discovered that EVERYONE had called out and I was left working with a skeleton crew. I left EXHAUSTED! I guess it's not bad considering we have lived in NJ for over 6 years now and this is the most snow I have had to suffer through. At least it doesn't snow in October/November like other areas in the North.

Trapped

Feeling trapped is a terrible feeling. Some people feel the daily pressure of confinement from the amount of debt they have acquired others feel confined by a life less than what they had planned for. And others, like myself feel trapped in a job that makes them miserable. Why stay? Here are a few of my reasons:

1. It is 3 weeks before Christmas. Who would quit a job right before Christmas time? Staying employed gives a sense of peace when it comes to buying gifts for two little boys.

2. We are still in the middle of a recession. I have many friends who are dealing with unemployment from both adults in the family. While I may be unhappy with this job, at least we have the secure of two incomes right now.

3. Nursing is a difficult profession to get a job in right now. It took me months to find this job. The reason it was so difficult boils down to experience. The more experience you have, the better the job you can receive. I am building experience.

4. I will soon be confined at home with a newborn. I can tough out a few more weeks or months of misery for those first few months just staying at home with my new baby.

5. I have NEVER been one to quit. Call it stubborn, call it stupid. It might be the challenge...I don't know. But it kills me to quit anything.

6. I am in debt with the federal government for my nursing degree. I need money to pay back all those student loans.

So, why is my job so miserable? It's not the patients and it isn't the work. I love being a nurse. I hate my job because I work for a lady that will call you into her office and call you a piece of dirt to your face. Who sits behind a desk and barks orders at everyone and has no idea what it is like to actually work on the floor. A woman so terrible that she makes at least one person cry a day. And I feel sad that one person can make so many other people miserable. It really is a shame that someone with as much power as she possesses can't use that to inspire and uplift people. Instead of grinding them into the ground with her fake heels. Oh, and in case you want to know what she looks like I have included a picture.

She really does look like Rosanne Barr from the movie She Devil. (mole included)